Thursday, September 22, 2005

Another day

I had this whole post planned that I was going to write. Now I can't remember any of it. I think I am starting to suffer from CRS disease. So anyway, today is still blah because it is gloomy out, with the possibility of rain. Lovely. Yesterday I got home from work and my wife was in the bedroom with her homework all spread out on the bed. I had reading to do for homework as well, but no where to do it. She was in the bedroom, it was raining outside, Sponge bob was on in the living room. I finally sat down at my computer desk and tried to read there. I managed to get through 2 sections before dinner. After dinner I cleaned up and figured that since my wife wasn't back in the bedroom I could go read in there. I get in there and start to move stuff out of the way so I could sit down and she comes in. She wanted to know what I was doing. Um hello? This is my bedroom, you gave up any right to it when you started cheating on me! I didn't tell her that, but I damn sure wanted to. I guess I am too nice for my own good. I told her that since she wasn't in there I wanted to sit down and read my homework. She said that was ok with her as long as I helped her by going through her homework "flash cards" with her real quick. Umm wait a minute, "it's ok with her" ??? Why can't I just blow up at her and tell her to go study on her bed? Oh wait, thats the damn couch in the living room! Yeah I'm definitely too nice. So after about 30 minutes she stops doing her studying and goes out to her computer. I stayed and read my homework until bedtime. I have no idea what I'm doing anymore. I know I feel like shooting someone, but it isn't her, and I don't know exactly who it is that I want to shoot. Not that I ever would, but that little voice in my head is starting to get louder and meaner. I do know that I am tired of sleeping alone, I just want to hold a woman who wants to be held. Even if it is just for a night. I need to find a "friend with benefits" that people keep talking about. Anyone know where I can find one? Make a nice day!

1 comment:

KevinWByrd said...

You need to go ahead and say those things that you want to say.

Don't do it because you want to be mean. We know that's not why and so do you.

You need to say them so that you make your stand on just how out of whack her view of this situation is.

She still expects you to pander to her and she is the center of everything.

You need to be selfish. She needs to know you are not an appliance.
Your not a tool and you are no longer an infinite resource for her to call on at a whim.